Category Archives: Uncategorized

Spilled Milk

I was recently reminded of the old saying, “There’s no use crying over spilt milk” when a helpful family member noticed that the milk had been left out on the table after breakfast and enthusiastically picked it up before realizing that the lid had only been set on the jug.

It took many hands with rags to wipe up and then clean the milk from the floor, cupboards, and chairs that two twists of the hand could have saved. It was also a small thing for many hands with rags cheerfully working together to clean up the mess. On my hands and knees with a rag, I realized that one of the beauties of the Atonement of Jesus Christ is that when we choose to follow Him many of life’s messes are avoided. Yet, when we as humans become casual in our care of His commandments, when we are less than we could be, He sends help and comes running Himself, drawing us closer to our brothers and sisters and Him as we clean up the mess.

Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, both our faithful diligence and our less than valiant efforts can be for our gain. In our goodness and in our weakness it is to Whom we turn that makes all the difference. “The Lord does not require perfect faith for us to have access to His perfect power. But He does ask us to believe….trust in His mercy, His infinite love, and His strengthening, healing and redeeming power. The Savior is never closer to you than when you are facing or climbing a mountain with faith.” (President Russell M. Nelson, April 2021)

He will bless our strengths and our weakness as we turn to Him and follow Him.

All Things For Good

On January 18, 1917, at the age of 37 with a growing family, Stephen L Richards was called and ordained an Apostle of the Lord, Jesus Christ.  “Though his load was heavy and his health no too robust, Stephen L has been able to keep up his schedule because he knows how to relax.  He bears no scars of this ‘age of ulcers’…Always carefully attired, you will find him of a summer day in soft wool shirt and trousers, both neatly pressed, but casual, walking where sunlight filters through tall Douglas fir or sitting before the snug fire that burns in the grate of a modest mountain cabin.” (Gordon B. Hinckley, Improvement Era, July 1951, 514)

Those mountain cabins began in Parley’s Canyon at Mount Air,then to a cabin near Mack’s Inn where the family played and fished in the Snake River.

“In 1934 at a Sunday School conference, Stephen L suffered a slight heart attack and it became progressively more difficult for him to wade the river and whip the stream as he called it…” (L. Stephen Richards, Jr. 1991). He and his wife, Irene, began looking for a place where the family could boat and troll and found that place at Hebgen Lake where they built a cabin in 1944.  
 
A slight heart attack and health that was “no too robust”, events that would not often be seen as blessings, brought the Richards family to Hebgen Lake.  In the intervening eighty years, the Richards family have built or bought cabins to house generations on Hebgen Lake.  Every summer my family is fortunate enough to spend a week with cousins and family boating and playing on the lake and in the forest.  “It has indeed been a place for regeneration for the soul away from the cares of the world and has provided for the family an unusual identity and love for one another.” (Ibid)
 
“With our trust and faith in God, trials and afflictions can be consecrated for our good…. Lived with faith, trials and sacrifices we would never choose can bless us and others in ways never imagined.” (Elder Gerritt W. Gong, April 2024)
 

Journey of Discipleship

Named for her grandmother, Drusilla Dickenson Hartley, my third great grandmother, was born in 1824 in Pennsylvania.  Her mother passed away when she was ten and her father soon followed leaving her an orphan at the age of 11.  Eventually Druscilla moved with her oldest brother’s family to Indiana where in 1842 at the age of 18, she became a single mother giving birth to her first son, Martin.  
 
Though Drusilla did not share the faith of her brother and sister-in-law, in 1844 she and her son moved with them to Macedonia, Illinois.  Her brother began helping in the effort to complete the Nauvoo temple and on August 28, 1844, Drusilla married Joshua Parker who had joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints several years earlier in New York City.  Joshua adopted her son, Martin, and they had a child of their own all while persecution intensified in and around Nauvoo.  In February of 1846 wagons ventured out onto the frozen Mississippi, headed west. 
 
Joshua and Drusilla joined other saints who instead of heading west, went south to St. Louis where Drusilla was united by baptism to her husband’s faith in December of 1846.  Over the next several years, Drusilla gave birth to three children, two of whom died as infants and their little family moved first from St. Louis north nearly 200 miles to Bonaparte, Iowa and then 250 miles west to Kanesville, Iowa to rejoin the main body of the church.  
 
On May 21, 1852, Drusilla gave birth to her first daughter, Mary Melissa, in Kanesville, Iowa and in early July, Joshua and Drusilla joined a handcart attachment of the Robert Wimmer Wagon Company.  A cabinet maker and carpenter by trade, Joshua created a suspended cradle on their cart that carried their daughter to the Salt Lake Valley where Drusilla would spend the remaining thirty nine years of her life.  
 
Like Drusilla, each life comes with mistakes, detours, faith, heart break, joy and persistence as we travel our own path.  Through each adventure of our lives, the Savior, Jesus Christ, beckons, “Come, Follow Me”.   Wherever we are, whatever our path, He knows the way and can lead us home, mend our hearts and fulfill our deepest desires.
 
“The Savior invites us, each day, to set aside our comforts and securities and join Him on the journey of discipleship.  There are many bends in this road. There are hills, valleys, and detours. There may even be metaphorical spiders, trolls, and even a dragon or two. But if you stay on the path and trust in God, you will eventually find the way to your glorious destiny and back to your heavenly home.” (Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf,  October 2019)

Change of Heart

This week I found myself in the font room of the baptistry of the temple, squeegeeing water off the floors and handing out towels to those who had participated in offering the ordinance of baptism to those on the other side of the veil.  When I first arrived in the room, a young man who was small in stature was performing baptisms with the authority of Jesus Christ.  Several of those he baptized were much larger than he was but he persevered with a smile.  Two friends came in and asked if they could baptize each other.  The first to perform the ordinance spoke with an impediment and carefully uttered the words of the ordinance. Then he and his friend switched places and his friend continued to serve baptizing several others.  The baptistry coordinator helped a young man in a wheelchair maneuver his chair so he could serve as a witness to the baptisms taking place and then brought paper towels to wipe away any hair that had accumulated around the drains. There were men and women, young and old.  Some came with family, some came with friends and some came alone.    

Though we often create a hierarchy of importance in our minds, the Lord’s measurements and purposes are different.   “For the Lord seeth not as man seeth;…the Lord looketh on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)  Regardless of our roles, abilities, or limitations,  we were all in the same room, engaged in the same work and He poured His Spirit out on each of us.  In the process, He was changing our hearts, our minds and our souls with the power of His Spirit.

As we seek to draw near to the Savior and bind ourselves to Him, it will not be a list of accomplishments that bring us there, it will be the refining influence of His Spirit.  “As the Holy Ghost exerts a greater influence in our lives, we progressively and iteratively develop Christlike attributes. Our hearts change. Our disposition to do evil diminishes. Our inclination to do good increases until we only want to ‘do good continually.’ And we thereby access the heavenly power needed to endure to the end. Our faith has increased, and we are ready to repeat the powerful, virtuous cycle again.” (Elder Renlund, April 2024)  

Bit by bit, cycle by cycle, He changes our hearts, He changes us until we are like Him.

Always Very Near

My paternal grandmother’s family began settling the British colony of Virginia early in its history.  Over time they moved into western Virginia and there they have remained for more than two and a half centuries.  My grandma was born less than a mile from the land her great great grandfather settled and she grew up surrounded by aunts, uncles, cousins and family. Many of my dad’s cousins still live in West Virginia near the old homesite and I smile just thinking about being there.  Though I now live nearly two thousand miles away, in so many ways, the hills, the rivers, and especially the people of West Virginia feel like home to me.

This week our daughter played in her first major women’s golf tournament of the summer and we enjoyed visiting with many of the players and parents she spent several years of junior golf with before they all went to college last year.  We exchanged stories from the past year and received updates on how the college golf season had gone for each of our girls.  As the banter continued, I was asked how it was having my daughter so far away as she attended Southern Virginia University.  She thrived in Virginia and as I responded, I also felt grateful for the angels who encircled her there.  From the seen coaches, teammates, roommates, friends, teachers and advisors, there were also unseen angels. 

Southern Virginia University is less than an hour and a half from where my grandma was born and raised and while she does not know many of my dad’s cousins personally, I do, and they know who she is too.  She is their family and in a time of need they would give her aid.  
 
As children of God on earth, each of us is “…separated from Him with whom they had walked and talked, who had given them face-to-face counsel….God knew the challenges they would face, and He certainly knew how lonely and troubled they would sometimes feel. So He watched over His mortal family constantly, heard their prayers always, and sent prophets (and later apostles) to teach, counsel, and guide them. But in times of special need, He sent angels, divine messengers, to bless His children, reassure them that heaven was always very close and that His help was always very near.” (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, April 2008) We are surrounded by angels seen and unseen who walk with us, comfort us and in times of special need lend their aid.  His help is always very near.

Our Secret Garden

I have watched a lot of golf in my life.  Most of those who play at a high level love the game of golf. A good portion of their waking hours are spent thinking about, practicing, talking about, playing and training for their sport.  I have seen players execute shots most golfers only dream about yet few express joy at the accomplishment.  Instead, displays of frustration often follow a missed putt or an errant shot and at the end of the round, conversations rarely recount good shots instead choosing to ruminate on the ones that went astray.

This weekend as I watched the Provo Open golf tournament, I was introduced to Rocky, who was serving as a caddie for a friend. Rocky sees the world differently than most of us and though living in the body of a fifty year old man, he frequently expressed the joy of an eleven year old boy.  After each shot off the tee, Rocky would enthusiastically call out, “Good shot, champ”.  He watched his friend for cues on when to be sad at an errant ball but when a putt rolled into the hole he knew it called for a “Whoo Hoo Hoo Hoo!”  It seemed no one was enjoying the tournament more than Rocky and we enjoyed it more too as Rocky exemplified the timeless truth,  “Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend…” (Sarah Ban Breathnach)

In the garden of our lives we can tend to the weeds and worry over them or nurture and enjoy the beauty of the blooms and blossoms.  “In this life, at least, joy and sorrow are inseparable companions.  Like all of you, I have felt my share of disappointment, sorrow, sadness and remorse.  However, I have also experienced for myself the glorious dawn that fills the soul with joy so profound that it can scarcely be kept in…Jesus said, ‘I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.’”  He offers all He has if we choose to see it, practice it and enjoy it.

Learning the Music

Ernest Shepherd, my great great grandpa, was born into a large, musical family in 1871.  His father and mother had joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints prior to his birth and the family moved from their home in Fawley, England to Paris, Idaho when he was six years old.  Good with his hands and with a love of music, Ernest carved and whittled his first violin from a wooden orange crate, He took a few lessons and learned to play on his own.  His daughter, Ada, remembered falling asleep in her upstairs bedroom to the sound of her father’s violin and other members of the orchestra who had come to practice for upcoming events and dances.  Ada learned to play the piano and Sunday afternoons were full of music at home while visitors came and went.  She remembered that as they played on those Sunday afternoons, “he insisted on every note being just right, always patient with me, and we loved the Sunday afternoons together.”

I can imagine a little girl falling asleep to the sweet melody of her Father’s violin.  Yet, he didn’t want that to be her only experience with music so he patiently taught her through every mistake to hit each note correctly, and become a musician herself.  As she grew she joined the orchestra and they played together at events throughout the year.  
 
Our Father plays the sweet melody of redeeming love.  While it is beautiful to hear, He doesn’t just want us to be hearers only and entreats us to come follow, come practice, come play, come learn the music of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  He wants us to play with Him the beautiful strains of redemption, eternal life and joy.

The Journey

In 1916 and 1917, books containing the histories of Greenbrier County and Monroe County, West Virginia were published.   The histories give no sources but tell the story of my fourth great grandfather, Tristram Patton, who at the end of his life owned nearly 2,000 acres that straddled the border of the two counties.    According to the stories, Tristram was born in Ireland, emigrated as a young man to Philadelphia where he taught school, participated in the Revolutionary War and then joined by his younger brother, Robert, came to western Virginia where they built mills on Second Creek and farmed the land.  In 1808, Tristram married Jane Nelson and together they had 14 children all of whom lived to maturity and 13 of whom married and had children themselves.  
 
Over the years, I have researched each one of his children and their families, connecting with many of his descendants and discovering family Bible’s, letters, pictures and stories passed down through the generations.  I have joined with distant cousins with the goal of finding Tristram’s family in Ireland.We hired professional genealogists and made a trip to Ireland to learn how to use the Irish records that exist as so many have been destroyed.
I joined a research project and became adept at using the Ireland Registry of Deeds as we made abstracts of every deed that pertained to the Patton family from the beginning of the registry through the early 1800’s.  We have scoured the Public Record Office of Northern Ireland.  We have used dna to connect to genetic cousins, one who can trace their line back to Ireland, and had the great fortune of meeting Marcus Patton who lives in Northern Ireland and has the records his father kept of his own extensive research on the Patton family.  Yet with all that I have learned and experienced, I still do not know who Tristram’s parents are.  
 
“So often we get caught up in the illusion that there is something just beyond our reach that would bring us happiness: a better family situation, a better financial situation, or the end of a challenging trial….Sometimes in life we become so focused on the finish line that we fail to find joy in the journey….There is something in each day that can bring gratitude and joy if only we will see and appreciate it.” (President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, October 2012)
 
I may never know the names of my fifth great grandparents.  Yet, while the end goal is still not achieved, I have loved those who joined me in the pursuit and been blessed by the people and stories I have found along the way.  There is so much joy in the pursuit of our desires, our dreams, and our hopes and so much satisfaction in the way it expands my soul.  Keep dreaming, keep striving, the pursuit is worth the effort.

Fill the Whole Earth

When my grandparents sold their cabin, I claimed an old platform rocker that was situated near the large front window.  The rocker was a gift given to my great great grandmother, Eliza Ann Lewis, by her brother when she married in 1893.  The rocker sat in Eliza’s kitchen and while it was used as a place to sit while her hands were busy, it could also be transformed into a bassinet by well placed slats and a cushion, keeping her children close and under her nurturing care. 
 
Though she had little opportunity for education, she had a natural aptitude in caring for the sick and was often called on in their rural community.  My grandma was born in her home.  A doctor attended but after he left, it was Eliza’s careful eye and quick action that cleared Grandma’s blocked airway preserving her life and all the lives that would come after.    
 
Eliza’s presence was felt by loved ones snuggled under the beautiful quilts she made and in the homemade gingham bibs she would mail for grandchildren who lived far away. 
 
Her presence was in her pantry full of garden fresh produce carefully preserved.  It was in the plates of food her children carried from her kitchen to sick and elderly neighbors and continued in the plates of food her children carried from their kitchens to elderly and sick family and friends.  
 
From her small, rural home in Paris, Idaho she sought to fulfill the prayer to  “Remember…all their families, and all their immediate connections, with all their sick and afflicted ones, with all the poor and meek of the earth that the kingdom, which thou hast set up without hands, may become a great mountain and fill the whole earth.” (D&C 109:72)
 
Her daily kindness, faith, work, caring, love and generosity have rippled outward through generations as an example and witness of the love of God for His children.  Though our efforts and our sphere may seem small, the Lord can cause them to “become a great mountain and fill the whole earth” with His love.

Failure is When You Give Up

Recently, I was editing an AI transcription of a cassette tape recorded by my mother in November of 1974.  My parents had moved to Virginia a couple of years earlier when my dad was stationed at Fort Eustis as a transportation officer in the United States Army.  Long distance phone calls were expensive so my mother would mail her mother “newsy” cassette tapes and her mother would respond in like manner.  
 
When Dad’s military service was completed, they accepted a job that took them to Herndon, Virginia and the tape tells of their participation in the “public viewing” for the newly completed Washington D.C. Temple that drew 758,000 people.  Dad and Mom participated in follow up visits to those who had requested more information after touring the temple and they were getting ready to take a turn cleaning the temple in anticipation of the dedication.  My mother’s thoughts flowed into the cassette tape, “I remember it used to bother me very much that in a very common statement, President McKay said, ‘No success can compensate for failure in the home,’ and I thought that’s true, and I know it is but what about the things that sometimes don’t happen…and I remember Elder Ashton giving a talk and he said that failure was when you gave up.” (Ann Summerhays, November 1974). In a simple sentence she bore witness of the continual hope of the gospel of Jesus Christ.
“As we attend the temple, there can come to us a dimension of spirituality and a feeling of peace….We will grasp the true meaning of the words of the Savior when He said: ‘Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you….Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid’… I bear witness that there is nothing more important than honoring the covenants you have made or may make in the temple…I can assure you…’No matter the outcome, all will be well because of temple covenants.'” (President Henry B. Eyring, April 2024)
 
There will be no permanent failure when we bind ourselves to Jesus Christ and never give up. “Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”